A shiver runs down my spine as Thor and Iron Man engage in a tete-a-tete that expresses itself through violence. The shiver is not the emotional resonance of the bromantic liaison but a genuine, arm-rest grabbing vibration.
Welcome to the next dimension in cinema viewing, in addition to the three others with which the massed Avengers are assailing my senses.
A helicopter swoops. To the left and right of me, my co-pilots brace themselves. The D-Box seats, programmed frame by frame, 30 movements a frame, respond to the action on the screen for on-the-button sensory feedback.
Cineworld at The O2 is one of only three theatres to install them thus far (the other two are in Glasgow and Milton Keynes).
"It's nothing to do with a theme park ride, it's all about immersing you in the movie," said Guy Marcoux, vice-president of marketing for D-Box technology.
And he was right. Sort of. Fearful that the vibrations, swoops and chirrups would be an irritation, I kept my seat down low, to a healthy heart murmur akin to a loud sound system.
But I was missing out on Joss Whedon's spectacular set pieces and took it up to the metaphorical 11. Suddenly the point of the exercise hit home. When movie and seat are in perfect sync then here's a killer app that puts home cinemas to shame.
When the movie goes quiet, so does the chair. It's not like a yappy nephew craving attention. In fact, you forget about it half the time until it kicks in and the world falls away and Hulk's fury becomes apparent in your kidneys.
"Sales have been spectacular," said David Spence, general manager of Cineworld at The O2. "All the seats are being booked out in advance."
Just pity the poor guys in ordinary seats. They might have paid less (D-Box can add a premium of £5.50) but they're forced to watch in their peripheral vision as the select few in the D-Box rows jiggle, jerk and yelp their way through the movies.
Makes 3D feel like, well, 2D.
© First published in The Wharf, May 2012
